Here And Now…


I have come to believe the old adage that “Life is 10 percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you RESPOND to it”. For so long, I have had it all twisted. I was allowing the happenings of life to consume me and my responses were based on my fear of what would happen next.

Today… I am fearless.

Tomorrow is not promised so I have chosen not to waste my time analyzing each and every “what if” possible. I do not know what tomorrow holds and I accept that.  I do not know if I will be happy and I embrace that. I do not know if anything will change but my disgust with complacency, redundancy, and traveling in circles is at an all-time high so I am determined to make tomorrow different.

 All I know for certain is that I am here TODAY and I am satisfied with the decisions I have made up to this point. Even through the pain… I am okay with it.

Over the years, I have grown more and more into the woman I feel I was destined to become. I have matured from impatient and violent to calm and levelheaded (for the most part). I have learned to forgive even though I have yet to master the art of forgetting. I have grown accustomed to chasing my dreams, visualizing my goals, and reaching them. I am happy with the personal progress I have made within my life.

But… everything doesn’t suddenly flow smoothly because I have progressed. Sometimes there are situations beyond your control. I have learned to stifle the urgency to control them. Instead I find myself praying prayers of serenity… asking God to grant me the wisdom to act in a manner that coincides with what He desires of me.

I am not perfect but I am a work in progress and before this year began I declared it would be my year of PROGRESS… in each area of my life. I have spent many years broke, depressed, and mad at the world. I spent many years asking for handouts because my ends would not meet and now that they have become acquainted I am more than determined to keep them that way.

By any means necessary… & that may be a bit of an exaggeration but you must understand…

I have chosen to RESPOND accordingly…

Remembering life is only 10% of what happens to you…

I have learned that sometimes our hearts desire what they are accustomed to receiving and not necessarily what is meant to be. I spend time praying and asking God for guidance… but I am learning how to FOLLOW the answers He provides.

I don’t necessarily like the answers…

I guess that’s why I have chosen to ignore them up to this point…

But TODAY I am listening…

Like a child who needs her father’s permission to go outside. God has given me permission to move forward… wherever this road leads, I am on board.

Life is what you make it…

90% of making it is responding without fear to situations and circumstances that have the ability to break you down.

90% is having the courage to move towards the unknown

90% is learning from experience that insanity IS doing the same thing over and over and over and expecting different results

90% is seeking different results…

I don’t know what tomorrow holds but I know I want different results…

& so I have chosen to LIVE IN THE HERE AND NOW




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