Its our ANNIVERSARY!!
This time 2 years ago I was wiiiiiiiiiiiiiide awake… kinda like now. Nervous and excited all in one. Eagerly awaiting sunrise so I could get ready for our big day. Awwww… the memories. Here we are 2 years later… still married. For those reading it may be like “duh” BUT to those who have any idea you KNOW how major this anniversary is for me. It took an entire year for me to change my name to Gordon. Actually, let me give myself some credit… a year wouldve been March 9, 2010. I got my name legally changed March 4th LOL BIG DIFFERENCE lol
2 years ago I was filled with so much excitement… I smiled at the many possibilities that lay before us. I was ready to take on the devil… and I did. Head on… and 2 years later, Im still winning the battle. *In your face naysayers!!!* This has not been an easy journey. I dont believe ANY living soul alive can attest that their marriage has been constant sunshine and roses…BUT it is a journey I am taking with a man I love dearly and I am happy that we are together. I appreciate all of the things we go through because I know for whatever reason God is allowing our union to be tested. I know God will never put more on me than I am able to handle and in that truth I know I’ll make it regardless. When I spoke my vows 2 years ago, I meant every single word. I knew we would face obstacles… he would be bipolar… I’d still have my attitude. I knew we’d be upset and angry and irrational at times. I expected difficulties… but most importantly, I expected to overcome those difficulties. I expected our love to sustain us during the times our minds were made up to do otherwise. I know there is always the chance of divorce…Im reminded of the daunting statistics every time we fuss and fight. However, Im reminded of the possibility of forever more often than not… and the mere possibility makes me stick around.
I have learned that in order to get to a better place in my marriage, I have to believe a better place exists. Not only must I believe it exists, I must have faith that we are going to get there.
“Become a possibilitarian. No matter how dark things seem to be or actually are, raise your sights, and see possibilities- always see them, for they’re always there” ~Norman Vincent Peale
“If you keep on saying things are going to be bad, you have a good chance of being a prophet” ~Issac Bashevis Singer
My husband and I have been together since we were 17. I contribute that factor to a lot of the things we have dealt with within the course of our 8 year relationship. Issues we have faced, many entering relationships in their 20s wouldnt have to deal with. We have had to grow up and learn ourselves as individuals AND deal with the other person growing up and learning as well. Its quite the predicament to be in… at 25, Im still trying to figure out who I am and who God wants me to be. At the same time, I am wife and mother. I thank God for each title I wear and I wear them proudly. I thank God for finding the love of my life so early on in my life. I thank God for pushing me to my limits and letting me learn the truth about who I am as a person… teaching me lessons of forgiveness, honesty, and maturity. I thank God for His amazing grace… for taking me out of situations I should have never been in. I thank God for 2 years of marriage… 730 days of being Mrs. Gordon… 17,520 hours of ups and downs… and a gazillion-trillion-to infinity and beyond lessons learned.
I know this is just the beginning… there is sooooooooooo much more in store for us. 2 years down… an entire lifetime to go.