Only The Strong Survive…

Celibacy is NOT for the weak. In fact, it takes a woman or man possessing superhuman capabilities to achieve such a feat. An attractive man/woman is like kryptonite for those who have already tasted the forbidden fruit. BUT… resistance is possible. Absitinence is possible. Purity is possible ❤ 

Growing up in a Christian household, I learned many things about myself, my religion, and the woman I wanted to be. I knew I didnt want to be some Jezebel. I knew boys sucked and were unworthy of my “badge”. After several of my friends started “doing it” (tsk tsk homies LOL), I made a vow to myself to refrain. My friend, Shilda, and I were in cahoots and decided to make a bet… we wanted to see who would be a virgin the longest. SOunds pretty lame but that bet helped me refrain maaaaaaany times. I kept thinking “I gotta beat Shilda. I gotta beat Shilda” LMAO Kissing became my favorite pasttime… and “Tease” became my new nickname. <<Dont ask me why>> *shrugs*.  Oh, did I mention I lost the bet? SMH

I am always quick to use myself as an example for abstaining from sex. I was a virgin until I graduated highschool… one of my greatest accomplishments to date. My husband was the very first person I had sex with… and 7 years later, we are man and wife. I am definitely happy it ended up that way… because the odds were stacked against us. The likelihood of being with one man and marrying that man is 1 in a million and I am beyond ecstatic that God allowed my story to be written that way. There were many times my husband and I tried to stop fornicating before we got married. At one point, we became really spiritual and we realized that sex would keep us from going to heaven. It seemed that everything else was in place in our lives… except the fact that he was my kryptonite and I was his. Despite our obvious spiritual connection with God and our desire to do as He instructed, we continued to backslide. I would cry and feel a tremendous amount of guilt afterwards. We would both repent and ask God for the strength to abstain. Easier said than done… needless to say, we never got a hold of that arena. However, we did get married and now there are a plethora of other “reasons” to send us to hell. SMDH We’re working on those though so I thank God for the desire to change. All of our “defects” are minor compared to the struggle it was to resist fornication.

Sex has been pushed so hard by the media that young people are drawn to it. In that industry sex sells, but in real life, sex can ruin lives (especially the lives of those easily persuaded). Purity rings have become the latest trend, with stars like Jordin Sparks, The Jonas Brothers, and Miley Cyrus pledging to remain virgins until marriage. Its a great representation for young people to see and an even greater goal for them to aim for. Although it is difficult to remain a virgin, I imagine the task of regaining your purity (celibacy) has to be most difficult and I commend ALL who have taken this route. 

I recently found out one of my homies are celibate… and it blew me away. Literally, I was at a lost for words.  Not because I thought she was promiscuous or because she has a reputation of any sort… but because I know before marriage I tried this route and I failed miserably! She has been on this journey for 10 1/2 months! Her story inspired me to write this blog. Her story is amazing… beginning at becoming a mother at 15 and ending in celibacy at 24… and I wanted to share it with you all. She is living proof that CHANGE is possible… and CELIBACY is a journey worth taking.

 In Her Words:

 Shaterica ♥ Age:24

1) What made you decide to become celibate? ALOTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
 
2) How long have you been celibate? The last time I had sexual intercourse was Jan. 3rd. 2010.
 
3) What are you able to do under the celibacy? (ex: kiss, touch, grope) I’ve kissed, touched and groped, I just haven’t had any penetration.
 
4) Are you dating during this time? I go on dates, but I’m not  “In a Relationship”
 
5) Are you waiting for marriage or for a guy you deem “worthy”? I’m waiting for marriage.
 
6) How difficult has it been? Have you slipped during this time? It’s been EXTREMELY difficult. I’ve had to pray about this SEVERAL times. Being saved does NOT take away the desire to have sex.
 
7) Do you have a purity ring? Are you going to get one? Why or why not? I don’t have one {yet}, I plan to get on on my One Year of No Sex Anniversary =D
 
8) ANy advice for others about sex and celibacy? I advise that you wait IF you can. Soul Ties are SERIOUS. Whenever you have sex you intertwine(spellcheck)  your soul with that individual. Sexually Transmitted Demons are REAL. Whatever demons he/she has are transferred when you have sex. I want my bed to be EMPTY on my Wedding Night.

I am extremely proud of you, Chip, for taking this route. I know God is equally proud of your progress and your dedication to live according to His desires. The flesh is weak but with God you can overcome and conquer ANYthing… celibacy included ♥
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10 thoughts on “Only The Strong Survive…

    1. LOL As mentioned in the post, I failed miserably at that as well. I think it was mainly because we were together all day every day… its probably easier to accomplish if you do not have a relationship. *shrugs*

  1. Go head now Shaterica! I’m currently 5 months into my celibacy journey. Every other time I’ve tried, I tried it on my own and failed. This time I’m doing it praying and asking for God’s help. And it has been SO much easier. Not saying I don’t get the urge, but I just don’t fall. So it can be done. I’m content right now waiting on the man He has for me.

    *First time at your blog. I’ll definitely be back 🙂

    1. Congrats on ur journey. I think it is truly a great thing to wait for the man God created for you. It will definitely eliminate extra mess you could get into if you chose the man yourself. I wish you well on this trying journey… I’m sure with God you will succeed equally as well as Shaterica has thus far. Thanx for visiting the site… Be sure to subscribe and come again 🙂

  2. I’m JUST reading this Mimi and I’m PROUD of you hun. I’ve tried it NUMEROUS times on my own and failed too. I’ve got this far by God’s Grace!!! I’m a MESS, and If I can JUST be honest, I want to have sex SOMETIMES, but my vow to God is VERY important. Let’s keep each other lifted in prayer!

  3. Thank you! 🙂 I will definitely keep you in my prayers. You will get the urge, cuz trust me I do, but this time I pray and ask God for strength. Cuz this journey is hard. It’s even harder now that I’m dating someone exclusively. But he wants to also wait for marriage, which is exactly what I asked God for.

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